Overview
The Programme
Notes
Juniper Club has a well-established training programme which is vertically and horizontally-integrated, ethics-committee-approved, evidence-based, peer-reviewed, randomised-controlled, GM-free, evidence-based, randomised-controlled and vertically-integrated. It combines the most recent post-modern science with elements of Feng Shui, Sudoku, Kung fu, Scientology, Ashtanga yoga, phrenology, Tai Won Mein and Kerplunk to provide a holistic, athlete-centered package that facilitates optimal performance through goal-centered process management and constant 360 degree appraisal.
Consists of a 12-day cycle.
Your training is only as good as your rest. Make sure you get plenty of rest.
Before each session warm up and have a big old stretch and yawn. Remember, loose muscles are quick muscles.
UT2 = Urn of Tea for two. Best done with a packet of milk-chocolate hobnobs. At this level of exertion you should just be able to hold a conversation with your training partner.
UT1 = Unaccompanied Tea for one. Best done with a packet of Oreos. At this level of exertion you will find it difficult to maintain a conversation as you'll be reading the paper.
Power chills - Ensure correct technique is maintained throughout. Click here for an illustration.
AT = Afternoon tea. Best with a plain digestive.
Transport - Can be train, car, bicycle. Why not visit your mum? Go on, you haven't seen her for ages.